Tonight is Tae Kwon Do for the boys, yours truly will be sitting quietly at the back of the hall hiding my bruises from last Thursday's Kicking and Screaming class (read as womens self defence). It was a free class held by the Tae Kwon Do association, and it was a real eye opener. Three black belts from the boys classes demonstrating various ways to inflict horrifying injuries on would be attackers. I think it's a Y chromosome deal...the more gruesome the injuries, the more involved they got, until I couldn't even watch, let alone take part. Until the knives came out....literally.
Master Austin produced two blades that looked like props from the Captain Feathersword Show, and I started having Monty Python flashbacks....cue John Cleese showing his class how to defend themselves from a man armed with a banana, and you get where I'm coming from....I really tried to keep a straight face, but the plastic knife blade wobbling in the breeze from the fan just did me in. I mean, there's fearsome and then there's frigging hilarious, take your pick. I went with hilarious, which is probably why I ended up being the crash test mummy for the last part of the demonstration and let me tell you, those black belts are built like brick pagodas...there's only so many times you can charge full tilt into a concrete man before it leaves a mark. Or several. So tonight I will be sitting at the back with a straight face and a tube of dencorub....villians beware!!