Monday, June 22, 2009

Bananaman and the Kitchen Exorcism

I have just finished scraping secondhand banana from every surface in my kitchen in the name of better parenting. Sebi's clinic results came back and apart from being skinny enough to see through, he's also lacking folic acid, iron and a few other things. This really doesn't surprise me, since he has long held the title of World's Pickiest Eater, but it does add several hours to my day as I chase him round the house with plates full of child enriching substances while he leaps the couch in a single bound and threatens to call Child Protective Services. Whatever he's low on, it sure isn't energy. He has a pathological fear of anything unfamiliar, although how he developed bananaphobia in this house boggles the mind....Finer 50% and number one son eat so many I'm surprised they haven't grown prehensile tails. But the mere sight of one is enough to send him into full panic mode, which is a major bummer as bananas are top of the list of "Things Your Son Must Eat Before His Next Visit". I managed to corner him in the kitchen this morning and actually got him to swallow a mouthful, along with several glasses of water "so I don't taste the badness", and things were looking up until number one son happened to mention that bananas are full of potassium. Seconds later my kitchen is inches deep in recycled monkey chow as second son has a major gag attack. His reasoning...."you know I hate potassium, mum!!" I bet Nigella's kids don't do this.


Scrapsister said...

Nigella's kids are placated by the sqillions of dollars worth of electronic gadgets and Happy Meals she plies them with in exchange for those forced gleeful smiles and sighs of ecstasy. That there should be reported to CPS.
Have you tried smoothies? I am guessing yes...what about coc-dipped? Banana splits? Frozen? B-B-Q'd? Do they come in pill form? Tell him it's space food ;)

Scrapsister said...

Oh dear...that really should read 'CHOC dipped' *call CPS on me now........


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